The Great Gazoo




Grousing about the Conservative Party’s supposedly backwards, antiquated agenda of liberty and free enterprise, Matthew Dowd, former chief strategists for George W. Bush’s 2004 campaign, likened CPAC and its Conservative followers to The Flintstones; primitive and ancient.

Dowd wasn’t even born yet when The Flintstones premiered, although he was born in 1961, so as a toddler, no doubt he’d seen The Flintstones, which ran until 1966.

The Flintstones – Fred and Wilma and their daughter, Pebbles – were billed as “a modern, Stone Age family.”  They had all the conveniences of modern life, including electricity.  But it was a self-sufficient electricity.  Fred’s car was famously operated by foot (which made one wonder why they had gas stations).

In every other way, they resembled a modern family living in the 1960s, having imbued the family values of the 1950s.  Fred was a hard-working crane operator at the local quarry.  What his best friend Barney did is unclear.  He and Wilma, though they often fought, stayed together and when Pebbles was born, he became a family man.  Shortly afterwards, the producers gave Betty and Barney Rubble an adopted son, Bamm-Bamm.

In one episode, it was discovered that the babies were talented musicians and soon rocketed to stardom.  But in the end, Fred decided his daughter shouldn’t be deprived of her childhood, and put an end to her career.

It might interest – or perhaps disturb – Mr. Dowd to realize that Bamm-Bamm was adopted.  His natural mother did not abort him or stone the child to death after birth.  Instead, the mother left him on the Rubbles’ doorstep (if memory serves).  In the real stone age and for many centuries afterwards, unwanted children were stoned to death, drowned, or left to die if the attempt to abort the fetus failed.  Today, there are pills to medically prevent
conception, or possibly induce abortion, as well as the medical operation called abortion, which either tears the fetus limb from limb via a vacuum, or the fetus is injected with a drug that induces a heart attack in the fetus.

So much kinder than drowning, isn’t it?

Late in the series, a character from outer space was introduced named “The Great Gazoo.”  An outcast from his planet for inventing The Doomsday Machine, his punishment was to “save” the Stone Age people from themselves.

When the gravel pit’s workers union demands a raise, Mr. Slate gives it to them, using the savings from the salary of Fred, whom he fires. Fred, in need of income, finds he has a knack for making gravelberry pies. He succeeds with his confections so well at first that he becomes the “Gravelberry Pie King.” But then the Great Gazoo intervenes, and, as usual, matters deteriorate from that point.

We don’t need The Great Gazoo to “save” us from becoming Fred or Wilma Flintstone.  We could do worse than become the modern Flinstones.  Indeed, it’s hard to understand Dowd’s comparison, since it’s the Progressives who want to get us out of our cars, use antiquated, unreliable energy systems, and live like primitive Neanderthals, even to uneducating our young.

What they don’t want us to do is to become successful making gravelberry pies, teach our children our work ethic, initiative, and independence, or enjoy the conveniences of modern life.  Although they mock us Conservatives as The Flintstones, the last thing they want is for us to become Fred and Wilma, and Betty and Barney, and Pebbles and Bamm-Bamm.

As long as The Great Gazoo rules the White House, however, we will revert back to the real Stone Age.



Published in: on March 19, 2013 at 12:32 pm  Comments (1)  

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One CommentLeave a comment

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