I’ve gotten some pretty great Christmas presents over the years: a dollhouse, a Barbie doll, and life-size doll when I was a child. I’ve gotten cameras, computers, and televisions, CDs, DVDs, and DVD players.
But this year’s greatest Christmas present, notwithstanding help on paying for a Canon EOS D60 DSLR that I got at a bargain price at the N.J. Camera Show, is that the Tattooed Lady, the Neighbor from Hell, the Rat Lady, is moving! For the last two weeks, I’ve been pretty certain that something was going on. Her sons were here, carrying things out, cleaning out the basement.
Christmas morning, they showed up with a bucket and a bottle of bleach. Earlier in the month, various backyard items vanished – her birdbath, her garbage pail, her bird-feeders, her plants, her patio furniture, and the fence surrounding the patio. Her annoying yard lights also disappeared. The hanging plants on the front porch also had vanished.
Dared I hope? I kept my enthusiasm to a minimum, lest I be disappointed yet again. Apparently, she meant to leave in September but one of her sons renewed her lease on her behalf. She was quite furious. But she stayed on past September 1st and my joy deflated. However, I suspected she wanted to go (she fairly screamed so at her son) but was having trouble finding a place that would accept an enormous female Black Lab.
Then yesterday, a rental moving truck backed up to the front door and they began loading in furniture. Yes, yes, I thought to myself, rubbing my hands with glee; she really is going. I find this morning that the moving process is proceeding apace. There’s one last chair left on her back patio. When that is gone, I know I’ll be free of her.
These last two years and three months have been a perpetual nightmare. The first summer was the worst. This summer, I bore her nastiness a bit better: I simply ignored her. She vanished for most of last winter, having gone through numerous operations for her condition.
Today, patience and steadiness have been rewarded. She is going – for good. Peace will reign in SG once again. I am going to take a walk this morning and buy a new tower birdfeed to celebrate the occasion, and perhaps play the Mormon Tabernacle Choir singing Handel’s “The Hallelujah Chorus.”
Soon, she’ll be “gone, gone, gone!” as Smeagol cried in The Lord of the Rings. “Smeagol is freeeeeeee!”
And so I will be, too! Hallelujah, readers, and a Merry Christmas and a definitely Happy 2014!