Star Wars Film Soars to Billions

Star Wars: The Force Awakens raked in over a billion dollars in its two Christmas holiday weekends.  Should we be surprised at this amount of money?

 

Considering the price of movie tickets today; considering the population increase since 1977; considering that this is a Star Wars sequel movie we’re talking about, not Robocop XIV – no, of course not.

 

People, especially kids, have only been thronging for the sequel-sequel since the last prequel came out about a decade ago. The animated series, Star Wars: Clone Wars ran for eight seasons and won an Emmy.  The films have only claimed technical and musical Oscars, by comparison.

 

Did director J.J. Abrams deliver? Well, he did and he didn’t.  He certainly delivered the whizz-bangs! And the boopity-boops.  And the laughs, at least throughout most of the film.  His success depended a great deal on secrecy and the deception of the trailers.

 

Who wouldn’t turn out to see Han Solo and his pal, Chewie, beaming from the good old Millennium Falcon again? Naturally, the film made billions.  The new stars are terrific.  They’re fine; no complaints there.  Handsome Oscar Isaac is sure to have teenie-girls drooling through the next two films.  Daisy Ridley delivers the girly-girl power, and John Bodega gives blacks a prominent, well-earned place in the Star Wars universe.  BB-8 is a cutie-pie, roly-poly droid; you just want to pick him up and pinch his little sensors.

 

It’s just too bad Abrams felt he had to jettison poor old Han Solo.

 

His excuse was that Han Solo wasn’t “moving the plot forward.” No?  Well, he sure moved the ticket sales forward.  Not bad for an old space pirate who grabbed all the laughs as soon as he and Chewie growled the way onto the screen.

 

Abrams claims he wasn’t moving the storyline forward. So why is it Han Solo is now scheduled to appear in the next movie, Star Wars VIII?  Either the next director (who mercifully is not Abrams) will either have to use The Force to magically resurrect Solo from the dead, or half the movie will have to be told in flashbacks.

 

Yes sir, that’s a great way to move the storyline forward, by going backwards.

 

The Harry Potter series killed off a number of popular characters: Sirius Black, Severus Snape, Albus Dumbledore, one of the Weasley twins, Dobbie the houself.  Even poor Hedwig, the snowy white owl was killed off.  But J.K. Rowlings didn’t kill off any one of the main trio:  Harry, Ron or Hermione.

 

The week the new film came out, the cable stations began running all the old Harrison Ford movies they could find in their archives. We were laughing at it:  someone should tell those networks that Han Solo died, not Harrison Ford!

 

From a production standpoint, you can understand why the producers needed to kill off Ford’s character early on. They never know when Ford will crash yet another experimental airplane.  Get the death scene over with, and flash back as much as you can in the event the actor kills himself off.

 

That would make sense. Claiming that Han Solo isn’t moving the plot forward is just absolute nonsense and shows a considerable lack of humility on the part of the director.  And I’d still like to hear a reason why Disney Studios and Abrams’ Bad Robot Productions didn’t make an appearance in the opening credits.

 

They’re bloated with gloat over their billions, earned through deception and not a little censorship, not to mention a bit of propaganda, citing only good reviews and squashing anyone who dares to dissent with the opinion that it was an entirely terrific movie.

 

What was terrific were the teasers, commercials, and product-tie in advertisements. Jeep’s commercial showing a couple enjoying the “peacefulness” of a star-filled sky through the vehicle’s moon roof is classic.

 

There are DVD players and apps coming out that will allow you to edit movies in the future. Once I can edit out the offensive scene, I’ll happily sing the Star Wars theme again.  The whole scene could just be cut out and no one would be the wiser.

 

Maybe I’ll even be able to cut out some of the noise so I can actually hear John Williams’ music.

 

 

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Published in: on December 29, 2015 at 4:12 pm  Leave a Comment  

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